She’s (not) Queen, sometimes

Image courtesy of Pinterest

“Bo-bo-boss! S-s-si Nili-li-li-kuambia Ma-Ma-Mary ni ba-ba- bad news,Njeru, the nosy caretaker stammers.

Consumed by bile I decide to ignore him as I clench my jaw.
Nkirote (your best friend then), vehemently rebuking me in a viscous Meru accent, which I always found hilarious upto this point. She is bickering into my ear as I try to sift through my share of the household items we acquired over the months. One issue though, we can’t agree on who takes the three seater. This couch that holds a plethora of memories, the first thing we ever bought together. And the first place we ever got…censored I wasn’t going to let it go, not that easy. You’re arguing that I’m only good at lying in bed hence I don’t need it, me claiming that I chipped in more moneywise towards buying it therefore I should have it. It’s 2 against 1, technically 3 against one inclusive of Nkirote’s loud mouth. I had no chance.
It is 5 A.M and I haven’t had an ounce of sleep. Partially because of my recent caffeine addiction but majorly because of Nkirote’s vicious snoring and sleeping tendency. Here I am on the eve of dawn stalking going through your Instagram profile for only the 80th time this week. This time finding two new uploads.
You, soothingly emulating a yoga pose. I want to like the picture but I’d come out as too thirsty, if I send a heart sticker I’d seem too desperate and if I leave a comment I’d come out as too aggressive. The second picture is of you and a guy seated on ‘our’ couch at your new apartment with the caption ‘the queen and the king’, ridiculous, ‘the beauty and the beast’ would’ve been more accurate but anyway how dare you? Is this how you disregard all that couch symbolizes? I contemplate at the picture for a couple of minutes fuming but at the same time trying to keep a rational reason, which I fail at, epically.

‘ You’re not a queen, your mother lied to you and his head looks too big for his body, a crown won’t fit!’ I send a DM

You leave me on read, for the 8th time in a row. This time deserved.

8 thoughts on “She’s (not) Queen, sometimes

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